we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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