apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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