Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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