these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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