Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
