3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
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