I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
