I'm gonna have a badass scar
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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