he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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