I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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