I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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