at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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