I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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