This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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