We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize