he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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