she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize