Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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