Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
