there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
God, you're like boner-b-gone
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
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