It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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