i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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