omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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