Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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