Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
