Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
