so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize