kristin has been a bad kristin
i already hear my dad disowning me
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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