I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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