That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
