Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize