I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
you had me at cake vodka
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
