the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
