Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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