This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize
