I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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