I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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