: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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