Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
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