There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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