I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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