do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
