Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
