Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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