addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize