EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
