I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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