I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
