hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
