you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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