No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
